27 Kinds of People Who Should Not Vote

If you have ever spent a hundred dollars on a Pokémon card as a form of investment then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you have ever won a lawsuit against McDonald's because you didn't know the coffee was hot, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you have ever seriously injured yourself while sticking a fork in the toaster, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are over 25 years and you still don’t know that your “Action Figures” are really man dolls then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you've ever had to be fished out of the monkey cage because your beer fell in, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you’ve been kissing your dog because his mouth is cleaner than a human’s mouth then you should not be allowed to vote, or date.

If you are happy to see that mullets are making a comeback then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you consider Sanjaya to be a celebrity, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you’ve ever ordered a mattress from Sky Mall then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are part of The WWE Smack-Down viewing audience then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are part of the 57% of American’s think a bidet is a medieval weapon then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are part of the 47% of Americans reading this who just Googled the word bidet, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are part of the 27% of the work force who admires French work ethic, then you should not be allowed to vote.

 If you are part of the 13% of the work force who is outraged by the French statement then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you consider the movie “Spaceballs” to be a classic then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you have ever spent the night waiting in line for Cindy Lauper, tickets then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you believe the right side of a double yellow line is for losers, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you have eaten more than two deep fried Snickers today, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are one of those people who believe that dinosaurs are an enormous hoax then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you have ever taped an episode of Joanie Loves Chachi, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you’re a man with a midriff shirt in your dresser drawer, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you ever drank your own urine because the Chinese do it, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you found yourself singing “Achy Breaky Heart” within the past three years, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you gave your credit card to your 16 year old daughter this morning to shut her up, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If your #1 defense against a terrorist attack is still duct tape and a roll of sheet plastic, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If your parenting skills have ever included the use of a leash on a three year old, then you should not be allowed to vote.

If you are burning an American Flag that you are not wearing, then you do not deserve to vote . . . and you’re a coward.